I love you mommy...

4 words that bring my heart to overflowing...4 words that I will never ever tire of hearing. When Isabelle randomly tells me how much she loves me, my emotions prickle my eyes and my heart thrums in my chest feeling like it is going to explode. While laying with her before she drifted to sleep her conversation went like this. "I love you mommy. I love you so darn much. Look at your eyelashes. You are so beautiful. You are a girl." Never mind that my mascara is halfway down my cheeks and my eyeliner is smeared among my wrinkles. I mean, what could make anyone feel so incredible as that? One of my biggest fears in life is failure as a parent. That someday my daughters might be living alone asocial with 74 cats, medicated, and in group therapy complaining about their overbearing mother and how she screwed them up. A few days ago Isabelle was saying, "I just can't remember that word. Oh, skeleton. I think I am losing my mind." She must have been hearing that I am losing it from time to time. Staying home while such a luxury and a blessing, it is challenging. I am always hoping that I am doing enough for them but I worry maybe my insane love for them and wanting them to be "good" could be stifling. As a parent I don't think you are allowed any do-overs...so this is my chance to do it right. And what a task that is!